[Seven by Nine Squares homepage] [tENTATIVELY] [ Neoist Path]

A Mere Outline for One Aspect of a Book on Mystery Catalysts, Guerrilla Playfare, booed usic, Mad Scientist Didactions, Acts of As-Beenism, So-Called Whatevers, Psychopathfinding, Uncerts, etc..

{3rd Edition - July '95 Version of Text Only}

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c/o the Funny Farm
RR 4, Markdale, Ontario, N0C 1H0,
or Box 382, Baltimore, Maryland, 21203, us@

Extroverted behavior of a calculatedly complex & politically/socially theoretically backed nature has constituted a significant part of my activities throughout most of my life. To many people, such behaviour is so-called "performance art". Not wishing to be "pigeon-holed", thusly enabling entities perceiving my actions to superimpose their stereotypes to oversimplify me, I've been substantially occupied with public self-contextualization resistant to previously existing categories. Failing that, I've often opted in favor of unpopular categories to attempt to give an "edge" to my activities - hence, I've preferred being labeled "criminally insane", for example, to being an "artist".

Since much of my life has centered around manifesting my imagination with "bizarre" appearance & behavior in everyday life, I've frequently encountered people trying to explain me. As such, I've been called "Hippie", "Jesus", "Charlie Manson", "Faggot", "Weirdo", "Hare Krishna", "Punk", "Clown", "Satanist", "Cult Leader", & "Skinhead" - to name some of the main ones that I've heard most often - "Weirdo" & "Clown" being, perhaps, the 2 most accurate. Given that even many of my friends find it difficult to even adjust to calling me "tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE", it can accurately be said that my struggle for self-definition has a long way to go.

Terms that I've used to describe some of my activities are:

Mystery Catalysts: activities meant to stimulate people's curiosity - usually by creating an unusual situation with no obvious source or explanation - see #s 14, 15, 16, 25, 49, 82, 178, 179, & 182

Guerrilla Playfare: unusual interactions &/or interventions in environments where such incidents are unexpected - see #s 12, 18, 21, 22, 24, 26, 27, 39, 40, 41, 43, 44, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 55, 57, 59, 63, 65, 66, 67, 99, 103, 108, 109, 113, 114, 135, 142, & 143

booed usic: an unpopular use of something (usually, if not always, sound) - see #s 62, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 79, 80, 99, 100, 101, 103, 104, 105, 106, 107, 108, 109, 110, 111, 113, #outline114, 116, 117, 118, 122, 123, 124, 125, & 127

Mad Scientist Didactions: lecture type situations generally with a perverse message & audio-visual aids - see #s 2, 8, 37, 38, 39, 47, 54, 56, 60, 64, 69, 70, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 101, 105, 106, 107, 110, 111, 115, 118, 120, 122, 123, 127, & 190

Acts of As-Beenism: these acts can be anything in which there's supposedly a demonstration of or reference to the possibility that roles are flexible - while in many ways this description might apply to almost anything I've presented, I've usually only applied this term in connection with "Generic As-Beenism" - see #s 101, 118, 122, 123, & 127

So-Called Whatevers: a very open term to describe just about anything that I might not want to label otherwise - see #s 177, 180, 181, & 185

Psychopathfinding: finding an outlet for psychopathic energy other than the violent ones usually associated with this explosive state of being - this usually involves some element of risk, confrontation, or role-reversal - see #s 12, 18, 24, 26, 35, 37, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 48, 50, 51, 52, 57, 59, 60, 65, 69, 77, 99, 102, 108, 113, 114, 120, 142, & 143

Uncerts my most recent term for audio focussed events - see #s 174, 176, 183, 188, & 189

etc..: can include aspects that I somewhat accept previously existing terms for - such as "Reading" {see #s 2, 4, 5, 19, 35, 37, 47, 68, 120, 130, & 173}; "Concert" {see #s 1, 3, 27, 28, 29, 33, 34, 71, 102, 117, 119, 121, 126, 128, 129, 132, 134, 138, 139, 145, 147, 150, 151, 172, 175, & 187}; & "Audience Participatory" {4, 5, 7, 8, 9, 12, 20, 21, 22, 25, 37, 39, 40, 42, 43, 52, 60, 109, 120, 104, 141, 142, 163, 164, 165, 166, 167, 168, 169, 170, 171, 180, 181, 183, & 185} - those actions in which I consider the conventional contexts of "Reading" &"Concert" to adequately describe their primary substance are isolated by being in brackets: [.....]

{The following list doesn't include "shows" in which I mainly participated by contributing 1 or more object(s) but at which I either wasn't present & at which no action oriented instructions of mine were being followed or "shows" at which I was present but at which my presence added little more than simple explanations (such as my Retrospective of 14 Films at the Empire Salon in Baltimore on May 30, 1982 & many, many other such events).}

1. [piano concert for 4 hands

2. clown reading

3. [folk music concert

4. audience participatory reading

5. audience participatory reading


7. a thing involving audio tape, tape playing machine, 2 cushioned seat speaker cabinets, 2 paid book-ends, emptied pockets & pocket-books, books, a book-shelf, & an audience?

8. GHOST FILM presentation with Ghost Writing Booklets

9. 30' long X 6' high paper dolls for 8 people

10. closed-circuit tv dressing room dress form action

11. STEE-V SQUEE-G DECODE "twins" in portable wardrobes stuffed with STEE-V SQUEE-G DECODE xeroxes

12. B.O.M.B. crashing of improvisation class

13. B.O.M.B. & Paper Dolls

14. Making a Display of Myself #1: Slanted Pencil Moustache

15. Making a Display of Myself #2: Dots on Face/"Bullet Holes"

16. Making a Display of Myself #3: Crunchy Peanut Butter on Face/"Skin Disease"

17. Visit to Lacquerland

18. B.O.M.B. at 3 Mile Island

19. reading in Cindy Heidel's Dating Game

20. t he phantom of t he opera

21. B.O.M.B. at Johns Hopkins Spring Fair

22. B.O.M.B. at TNT Parade

23. Another Visit to Lacquerland




27. nameless wandering wind ensemble

28. nameless wandering wind ensemble

29. nameless wandering wind ensemble


31. CRAB FEAST #3&1/4

32. CRAB FEAST #3&3/4

33. B.U.T.N. related conference call audio improvisation via WJHU

34. TINKLERS Big Band

35. reading by proxy

36. attempt to undermine "reality" maintenance traps

37. 3 part action

38. "krononautic divector field didaction">krononautic divector field didaction

39. Paper Dolls in Dava's Class

40. No No Class Umbrella Lesson

41. Seatbelt Violation Public Works Promotion

42. contest at Public Works Festival

43. Neoist Parking Meter Action

44. Mont Royal Cathedral Painting

45. LOW show

46. American Manoeuvres

47. reading

48. tENTATIVELY, a Skin Exchange

49. Publicity Stunt (performed by Monty Cantsin)


51. Anti-Music with/against Drz 4 "Bob"


53. Parade de Propagande

54. Blo-Dart Acupuncture &/or Ear-Piercing

55. acceptance of CERTIFICATE OF MERIT & a red rose

56. "If You've Only Got a Moustache" in "Tim Ore Frames Himself as a Graffiti Artist"

57. Poop & Pee Dog Copyright Violation Ceremony

58. An Interweaving of Familiar & Comfortable Items (for the Collaborators)

59. Thanksgiving Day Parade

60. "Alternatives to Vicious Cycles: The Intermingling of Sub cultures to Facilitate Understanding"

61. X-Mas in Lacquerland

62. booed usic

63. Figment of the Collective Imagination

64. Neoist Haircut (in the Popular Chapati Circus - act 1?)

65. Neoist Guide Dog

66. Les Promenades Hystériques

67. Halloween Demonstration Against Reagan

68. Form Love Letter reading

69. FILM


71. booed usic

72. booed usic on Mozart's 200th Birthday

73. tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE & t he booed usicians' Mad Scientist Didaction

74. tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE & t he booed usicians' Mad Scientist Didaction

75. tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE & t he booed usicians' Mad Scientist Didaction

76. tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE & t he booed usicians' Mad Scientist Didaction

77. Mad Scientist Didaction

78. Mad Scientist Didaction

79. Mad Scientist Didaction

80. Mad Scientist Didaction

81. Mad Scientist Didaction

82.-98. First Meeting Re-Enactments

99. pirate tv premier of "6 Fingers Crossed Country T.Ore/Tour" vaudeo

100. Easter Island Bunny Booed Usic

101. Generic As-Beenism

102. [Something that Dissolved the Shadow of Something that Was Next to Something that Burned Twice

103. street action with the booed usic busking unit

104. booed usic busking

105. "Less English" Mad Scientist Didaction

106. "Philosopher's Union Members" Mad Scientist Didaction

107. "More English" Mad Scientist Didaction


109. Tent's Muir

110. "More English"

111. Quasi-Documentary Residue

112. Tim Ore's participation in the Burning

113. Murraygate Busking

114. street action with the booed usic busking unit

115. Neoist MythStory

116. demonstration of the booed usic busking unit

117. [Concrete Mixing

118. Generic As-Beenism

119. [Volunteers Collective I

120. Dunking Booth Reading

121. [Volunteers Collective II

122. Generic As-Beenism

123. Generic As-Beenism

124. park presentation of the booed usic busking unit

125. booed usic

126. Something That Dissolves the Shadow of Something Which Was Once Close to Something That Once Burned Twice

127. Generic As-Beenism

128. ["Eloquent Voices", subtitled "Pathetique" for car horns (by Dick Turner)

129. [the Official, May 5th, 1990ev, 31st St. Between Greenmount & Barclay Block Party Combo

130. Hairballs, Wigs, & Weaves for Skinheads

131. the Official, Saturday, June 23, 1990ev, Patapsco Park, McKeldin Area, Paul & Cindy's Wedding Trio

132. [the Official, July 10th & 11th, 1990ev, Punch Night at the BAUhouse Trio

133. the Official, July 21st, 1990ev, disPlace, 1220 Curtain Avenue Sextet

134. [the Official, Friday, August 17th, 1990ev, People Who Play as a Part of Approximately the Same Event That Features Bands from Baltimore, Philadelphia, & New York Sextet

135. the Official, Sunday, August 26th, 1990ev, (12:30-1:15PM) Ringing Rocks Ensemble

136. the Official, August 28th, 1990ev, Shattered Wig Review Night at the Bow-Wow House One Man Band of Slip-Shods

137. the Official, September 14th, 1990ev, People Who Send People Back Somewhere Without Having Been There Before Twins

138. [the Official, October 12th, 1990ev, 14 Karat Cabaret Hungry Rabbit Touring Colony

139. [the Official, October 13th, 1990ev, 14 Karat Cabaret Hungry Rabbit Touring Colony

140. the Official, October 25th, 1990ev, Only Band in Town Without Courtney McCullough in it Quintet

141. the Official, December 31st, 1990ev, Kinko's Office Party, We-Miss-You-Neilers

142. End of the World Party

143. Protestors Against Gods in the Gulf

144. Protestors Against Gods in the Gulf

145. [the Official, May 18th, 1991ev, Open House in the Garage at 3PM Solo Quartet

146. [the Official, May 19th, 1991ev, Open House in the Garage at 3PM Solo Quartet

147. with Laughingtree

148. [the Official, August 13rd, 1991ev, Bughouse Apex Roto Zither Auxillary

149. the Official, October 28th, 1991ev, Pixilatin' Deadly Drolls

150. [the Official, Friday the 13th, Generic Neuro-Linguistic Programming Party Band

151. [the Official, December 14th, 1991E.V., Oh, I Forget..

152. the Official, January 18th, 1992E.V., Fake Party

153. the Official, March 21st, 1992ev, 14 Karat Cabaret, We're Not As Intense As John Duncan But We're As Worth Paying Attention To For Reasons More Complex Than There's Time To Explain In This Measley Band Name Band

154. the Official, April 29th, 1992ev, Band That Does Accept Money From Institutions

155. "Behavioral Drift #8/9 (The Slo GAME)" (by Franz Kamin)

156. the Official, July 25th, 1992ev, Band That Stretches The Amount of Typeface that Their Name Occupies Wildly Beyond the Parameters of Easily Remembered &/or Repeated Band Names in the Interest of Excessive (Self) Promotion Which Can Never Be Stressed Enough Given the Incredible Greatness & Simulated Originality of the Reality Bending Qualities of Their Quantum Psychological Playfare & Aleatoric Fortean So-Called Whatevers (not to Mention CAMUs) etc.., etc..

157. the Official, August 4, 1992ev, Band That If You Don't Hear Your Vital Organs will Shrivel up & Disappear

158. the Official, August 7th, 1992ev, CKUT, Late Night Atrocity Exhibition Barkers

159. the Official, August 7th, 1992ev..(another radio show)

160. the Official, August 7th, 1992ev, Foufounes Electriques CosmoRobotic $350.00 Boxers

161. the Official.. (another radio show)

162. the Official, August 12th, 1992ev, Zerowork Jubilee John Cage Cover Band Orchestra

163. the Official, August 15th, 1992ev, Zerowork Jubilee Morphing Center Orchestra w/ John Cage Interpreters

164. the Official, August 22nd, 1992ev, Dreamtime Corroboree Comb Salepeople

165. the Official, August 27th, 1992ev, Mercury Café Neo-Re-Exciters

166. the Official, August 28th, 1992ev, Mercury Café Neil-Re-Exciters

167. the Official, September 2nd, 1992ev, Kansas City Artificial Intelligence 'Tute Photo Studio Unknown Camera Obscura

168. the Official, Saturday, September 5th, 1992ev, Union Bar & Grill (Voted Athens Best Bar Live Music Featuring National Acts) Bug-Eyed H23 Visitors From Chronolytic Time

169. the Official, October 17th, 1992ev, Blank Blank Space Blank Space Blank

170. the Official, March 12th, 1993ev, Medium-Sized Band Who Have Just Put Out Their First Record & Who Will Be Selling Them At the 14 Karat Cabaret for a Fabulously Reasonable Price as well as at Normal's Music Store at 429 E. 31st st. & Who are more Wonderful, Original, & Imaginative Than Even the Most Overblown Hyperbole Could Possibly Even Begin to Praise & who have a Penchant for Very Long Hard to Remember Band Names That Even They Find Hard to Remember but how else can they Make Laure Drogoul, Baby MaDenney, & the Ever-Lovin' Pamela Purdy Laugh Otherwise? - &, Besides, This is Probably Their Last Show So Why Not indulge them a Little, Eh? Incredibly Rapidly Shrinking Big Band Orchestra OOMPH!!

171. the Official, March 13th, 1993ev, Medium-Sized Band Who Have Just Put Out Their First Record & Who Will Be Selling Them At the 14 Karat Cabaret for a Fabulously Reasonable Price as well as at Normal's Music Store at 429 E. 31st st. & Who are more Wonderful, Original, & Imaginative Than Even the Most Overblown Hyperbole Could Possibly Even Begin to Praise & who have a Penchant for Very Long Hard to Remember Band Names That Even They Find Hard to Remember but how else can they Make Laure Drogoul, Baby MaDenney, & the Ever-Lovin' Pamela Purdy Laugh Otherwise? - &, Besides, This is Probably Their Last Show So Why Not indulge them a Little, Eh? Incredibly Rapidly Shrinking Big Band Orchestra OOMPH!!

172. [Radio Music (by John Cage)

173. Red 19 & Angerds engMudsroodn (by Franz Kamin)

174. She Turns Alone & Unknowing Games at the Hut (Behavioral Drift 10) (by Franz Kamin)

175. [Volunteers Collective XVI

176. Theatre Piece & Radio Music (by John Cage)

177. Frank Monster

178. Table 2 Antics

179. Fake Murder at Table 2

180. Talkathon Promo

181. Talkathon

182. Sideways Couch

183. The Official..TV Audience..Medium Band

184. Klauhütte Bangzeit 2000's "Excavated Jewels of Ersatz Exoticism"

185. Das Offizielle, 21 Mai 1994 Era Vulgari Hypothetisches Tagediebetage Mittel-Band/Landesjugendorchester

186. Klauhütte Bangzeit 200's "Exotische Ausgrabung - The Impacted Nectarine Vexations of Mouldy Vinyl Reincarnations (A Tableau of Ersatz Exoticism"

187. [duet with Neil Feather

188. Broken Mood Elevator Uzak

189. A Triple "S" Variety Show straight from the bowels of the Turquoise, Beige, & Flesh Room at the Funny Farm

190. film vaudeo

191. [Improvisation @ WRCT

192. [Free Form Irritainment w/ Fabio Esq.

Fabio & I pre-recorded my intoning of these IDs while he mixed in other radio signals. This deliberately somewhat confusing beginning was followed by a playing of my "tENTATIVELY Microtonal" K7 + excerpts from the "Official Wafer Face Record" & my "Usic - √-1 = a Plethora of No Longer Neglected Audio/Conceptual Obstacle Courses" LP (used to mark the quarter hours). I plugged my upcoming film/vaudeo presentation at Segue in NYC & Russ Forster of "8-Track Mind" magazine plugged his film so wrong they're right & discussed other 8-track related matters.]


1st, the "Total Mobile Home Suitcase" (named after the micro-cinema run by Rebecca Barten & David Sherman in San Francisco that the suitcase was semi-inspired by) was placed on the lap of each audience member & opened. With each opening a different short audio piece was heard & the suitcase was then closed. When the suitcase reached a friend that I hadn't seen for 8 years (Alan Lord), it greeted him with "Hey, Baby". Another audience member pulled out a pouch of tobacco & pointed to it when the suitcase played a coughing sound for him. The 2nd part consisted of Colin Hinz & myself playing the double groove sides of "Usic - √-1". Colin played on a turntable that he'd made that has a wider variety of speeds than normal. Colin dropped fishplates on the record while playing it - just as he had during 1 part of the same record (on which he's represented remaking the "Official Wafer Face Record"). The 3rd part began with a straight presentation of my film "Diszey Spots" & was followed by my film "Funny Farm Summit Meeting". This latter is a film of a nudist mask party at the Funny Farm - a 19 room farm house in Ontario covered from floor to ceiling with kitsch & novelty items (etc..) collected, created, & organized thematically by the humorous "mastermind" of Laura Kikauka. This was where I'd been residing for the previous year. The film's sound-track was accompanied by John Henry Nyenhuis's playing grand piano whilst naked wearing the same mask that he was shown wearing in the film (whilst also playing piano) & by myself playing synthesizers & sampler while also naked & wearing the same mask as in the film. The 4th part was the fabulous world premier of my "A Year & a Day at the Funny Farm Bogus Piano Concerto - in 2 Rapid Bowel Movements". This involved John Henry playing keyboard while I played synthesizer modules, sampler, sequencer, midi-patcher, multi-verb, etc.. The relationship between our 2 parts was a sort of intricate mutual subversion in which John played with an almost super-human virtuosity & I mutated & immersed his pianistic linearity. The structure was such that John Henry began by playing furiously (in the "Left Wing Movement") & gradually slowed down. He began the 2nd, & last movement (the "Chicken Wing Movement"), playing minimally but triggering more notes than he touched. As this last movement progressed he gradually returned to furious playing but his pitch output was drastically reduced by my controlling. As such, the audience was presented with a variety of relationships between what his fingers were actually doing & what they actually heard as a result. Simultaneously with this was the projection of an extreme slow-motion film of mine (collaboratively made with the loveable Orgone Cinema folks) entitled "How Orgone Cinema Treats Its Visiting Filmmakers". This film, at 24fps, is only 5:40 long - but in this projection it was extended to 45:00 by having the projectionist play bits of it in both forward & reverse. The film features, amongst other things, fertilized duck eggs being thrown at the back of my head.

194. [w/ CCMC

To quote from the advertising, "Beginning the twentieth season of collectively created, freely formed music, the core members, MICHAEL SNOW (piano, synth), JOHN OSWALD (sax), [&] PAUL DUTTON (soundsinging) [..] are true "sonic swashbucklers"". CCMC play regularly at the Music Gallery on Tuesdays for free & encourage the fertilization of such new-comers as myself. I played synthesizers, sampler, sequencer, etc.. at a barely audible volume - sampling them live without pre-warning &, thusly, confusing their perception a bit.]
This list unfortunately doesn't include actions that I don't remember dates for such as the Fearless United Christian Knights (initiated by Alan Barysh) action at the Premier of Godard's "Hail Mary" at the Charles Theater in Baltimore.

For more accurately contextualized & detailed accounts of some of the above, read my books "How to Write A Resumé - Volume II: Making a Good First Impression" - especially the 2nd edition (edition of 200) - &/or "Yet Another Slow-Burning Feast of a Few Month's Mischief in the U.K., Maybe (A Partially Epistolary Account of Non-Non & Non-Participation, Maybe)" (edition of 100). Both books are out-of-print so GOOD LUCK in finding a copy!

The list of people who helped make these so-called whatevers possible would be enormous. The list of people who made sure things were miserable is much smaller. I want to thank the former. I want to refrain from mentioning the latter. Special thanks go to John Berndt who, despite our almost continually volatile friendship, has been very cooperative, generous, & supportive for much longer than most people would have tolerance for. Thanks also to Florian Cramer for making this & other texts of mine available on the Internet & for taking the time & having the dedication to make such a large effort.

c/o the Funny Farm,
RR 4, Markdale, Ontario, N0C 1H0, Caca-Nada

or - Box 382, Baltimore, Maryland, 21203, us@