He had "so much respect for silence" (view of a man locked in a white room with a blindfold on, now and again very old).
The distortion of memory occuring in the present tense.
Retroactive Journal entry, May 19: "letter; Dear mom, my position as God has become tenuous, may have to resign (suicide?)"
Our goal is this reconciliation and more.
Increase activations, increase negations of
activations, actively abstract behaviors and
inject increasingly insane content into these
abstractions. In this way we will achieve "life".
"1980-1990, an excellent period from which there is no escape."